I’m 90% sure that my oldest child is a hoarder.

Ok, maybe not a hoarder, maybe a scavenger is a better description.

To put it nicely, this child and I have very different views on cleanliness.

I went to drop something off in his room this morning and just had to stop, take a breath, and start cleaning.

Sometimes I just walk out, but the stuff was vomiting into the hallway and the bathroom, something had to be done.

So I started cleaning.

I ripped off his sheets, and in the process found a bag of wood chips and  5 pencils.

I made the bed and started to pick up the floor, where I found more pencils, erasers, all the dry erase markers in the house, 2-3 books of stamps (good thing those are free), several stacks of post its, and more wood chips!

I opened his nightstand in an attempt to put some of the stuff back where it belonged, bad choice.

The nightstand was stuffed full of bags of wood chips! What does anyone need with bags of wood chips!!!! And by wood chips I mean that crap that they have on the playground that gets stuck in your shoes.

When I lose something I automatically check this child’s room.

Every nook and cranny is stuffed with forbidden objects, things he found elsewhere and carted off to his room.

Why do you need 25 pencils and no paper?

Why do you need extra erasers for said pencils, books of stamps, and post its- these serve no purpose for a 5 year old!

But he keeps collecting this stuff.

I’m a little worried that some day he is going to become a person that collects empty Cool Whip containers, he will have dozens of them just hanging out in his room, saved for a “rainy day”.

My younger son also collects things. His collections tend to be a bit more organized. For example he currently has 13 superheroes precariously placed on the railing of his bunk bed. He also carries around a pencil box with 30 plastic dinosaurs (we counted), what is the purpose of this? You can play with what 3 toys max?

How do you stop this?

Or is this just human nature and I need to accept that kids collect the weirdest stuff?

Maybe I should celebrate that they don’t collect anything horrifying like toenail clippings and call it a win.